We dont spend any time together, we havent had sex in months
“Harry, its not just tonight.” I sigh , shaking my head. “Recently I just dont even feel like your wife anymore. I just…I dont know if I can do this anymore.” I bite my lip, my eyes beginning to form puffy rims.
I grab my purse in front of my vanity, and open my wallet, pulling out a business card I never thought id have to use
“Hey, hey, hey, no.” He grabs both of my hands, taking them in his own as he squats down to where were levelled in height. “You are the love of my life. I love you so much baby, and no amount of women is going to change that.”
Listen, he sighs as if hes forcing his words instead of genuinely meaning them “If its what you really want, I can stay home tonight.” I can already tell that even if he stayed, he would do so in a hostile mood. So before he mutters swear words under his breath, I briskly respond.
He doesnt look at me anymore, doesnt care about what I want before he briskly releases inside of me and rolls off of me in a hurry
“Its our anniversary next week, love. I swear we can have the whole day, just you and me. All I want is tonight. You can stay in, write some poetry and drink some tea. Ill be back before you know it.” He quickly replies. I can tell his mood is elated as he speaks quickly and his voice seems higher than usual.
The next morning, he walked in with sex hair and the same outfit he walked out in. He looks at me guiltily before rushing past me to our bedroom upstairs, the very place where I slept alone last night.
Harry is getting everything from this relationship. As far as the media is concerned, hes an amazing husband and were a happy couple. He gets to sleep with whoever he wants and its just no fair sometimes.
But I guess I dont get to complain. It was my selfish need to continue to be with him that brought us here to begin with.
Hes continuously typing away on his device. I know its because hes texting his other women. I talk about how my book is coming along and he pretends to listen, but then his phone vibrates and im speaking to myself and the walls of our home.
“Shes just my wife for publicity purposes, nothing more than that. We dont even have sex because I dont like her like that. Its not that big of a deal, I promise I can find a way to spend the night with you again. Just let me-” Harry looks over his shoulder to see me turning my head, heading towards what now just seems like my bedroom. It feels as if ive been cheated on for the second time and it hurts unbelievably badly.
And I slam the door from upstairs, sliding down the door and sobbing into my hands. Harry holds pieces of me everywhere he goes and throws them into women incapable of knowing what to do with them.
I cant help but think its more for himself than it is for me. That he did it because he doesnt want to lose this squeaky clean reputation that goes down the drain if I leave him. I could tell he didnt want to do it, resulting in me silently crying in bed afterwards, while the door slams shut and he leaves me again.